Turns out I was never as fat as I'd imagined. I was still somewhat overweight, but less so than my physique suggested - I was actually just suffering from an affliction called "dip hips" - Where instead of having regular hips there is a recess in the middle of what a normal person's hip would be, making the upper half of the hip appear as if it is a sideways extension of the stomach. Which would be the explanation for what looks like the stomach receding at the front and not likewise recede at the sides.
Conclusion - I wasn't that fat. I just have horrible genes.
Someone gas me please.
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